


Beastly

by Davechicken



Series: Kylux - Fluff & Angst [121]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-16
Updated: 2016-12-16
Packaged: 2018-09-08 21:40:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8863102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Davechicken/pseuds/Davechicken
Summary: Hux is not into... wildlife. Like this.





	

“How could you do this to me?”  


“Hux, it is not the end of the world.”  


“Only because you won’t let me build another Starkiller.”  


Kylo takes a deep, deep, deep breath. “Trust me.”

“The last time you said that–”  


“I _said I was sorry_. But seriously: trust me.”  


“How can I? It wants to eat me.”  


“It’s a vegetarian. A herbivore.”  


“I understood the first time, and as you regularly call me a root vegetable, maybe they will pick up on the thought in the Force and try to– HEY!”  


Kylo starts floating Hux slightly, but when he thrashes, he lets him down. “Don’t scare them!” the Knight huffs.

“You said they were safe! Why would I put a wild animal between my legs when there’s a perfectly good speederbike or shuttle to get around?”  


“Because it’s a _romantic_ ride off away from civilisation. Or it _would_ be, if you’d get on the damn thing.”  


“WILD. ANIMAL.”  


“You have no problems riding _me_.”  


“That’s _different_.”  


Then Hux stops moving, and Kylo bites his fist.

“Kylo… what is it doing?”  


“It’s… sniffling and chewing your hair.”  


“ _It is trying to eat me, Kylo_.”  


“It’s trying to groom you. It thinks you’re one of them.”  


“ _I am not. Please take me back to civilisation right now. We can fly over the romantic spots like a sane couple would, or I will blow the whole planet up piece by piece with every blaster I can find if it takes me a million years_.”  


Kylo rolls his eyes at the screeching love of his life, and then goes to pull the reins of both of the beasts to one side. “Sorry, you two. Looks like you’re not going for a walk today after all.”

“ _KYLO THERE IS SALIVA ON MY NECK_.”  


“…probably I’m not getting ridden either,” he mutters.   


“NOT UNTIL I AM FREE FROM ALIEN SLOBBER.”  


Which is rich, considering his porno fetishes. 


End file.
